Over the "hump"

I feel as if I've been avoiding an update, I just haven't had my "writing mindset" for quite some time now. I get my passion for writing from my Mom and since her passing it's almost like it I just can't put thoughts into words.

4 days from now marks 3 months since surgery, I'm in awe. I remember during the 3 weeks of liquids when I'd cry to Paul thinking I'd never get through it, crying with regret nightly, and now I can't even remember having the procedure.

This past Friday I went to the doctor for my back issues and was so upset because for 2 weeks straight I was still only at a 49lb. loss and I'd been praying to get to the 50lb. loss. Saturday morning I decided to go ahead and weigh on my scale as I do every Saturday morning and it happened...I got over the hump!!!! I have lost 51 pounds since January 9th!!! Aside from my back issues (mild degenerative joint disease/arthritis and severe muscle spasms that I'll probably start PT for), I feel great. My lab work shows that I'm good on all my nutrition except iron but I've always been anemic and my sugars aren't borderline anymore!!!

Almost all of my pants are too big but I am still in between and don't want to spend $$ on anything as I'll continue losing so I BOUGHT MY FIRST BELT ever!!!

I finally see it on myself more and Paul does too (it's hard when you see someone daily). I've seen some family and friends recently that haven't seen me since before surgery and they certainly notice and it's the best feeling and just makes me so thankful for going through this all.

I'm determined to truly start at least a 4 day a week exercise regimen next week because I want to lose at least another 40-50 by August 18 -- my wedding day!!!! I think that's been more exciting than the weight loss (maybe not but don't tell Paul). It's so funny how we finally set a date. Friday a few weeks ago we were just sitting outside at Dad's as we often do on Friday nights, Dad asked when we were getting married and we said August and then bam we picked a date, called the "immediates" to make sure their schedules were clear and went from there. I have never wanted a big wedding and without my Mom I honestly don't want one at all but it means so much to Paul to have a ceremony and for it to be officiated by a man or woman of God. We have already met with and booked a Rabbi that does interfaith weddings, we decided to have the ceremony at my Brother's home, some place I feel comforted, some place I feel my Mom's presence very strongly. We are inviting only immediate family which to me includes my Aunts, Uncles and first cousins, and my bestest friend. I want something low key, food, fun, drinking, talking, etc., because that's when my family always has the most fun. I hope that all my other friends and family understand. It'll be a very hard night without my Mom but I'm certain I'll feel her.

So, that's it for now, hopefully my little plateau is gone for a few months and I can keep shedding the weight and truly start my new life, as a much healthier Mrs. than I am a Ms.